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Teachings of Dog: Rewriting the Story

16/4/2021

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Mungo came to us in February... he was rescued from a Welsh puppy farm, where he had spent the first five years of his life.  Probably his only experience of love in all that time, since being taken from his mother, until he came to us, was the eight weeks he spent in a wonderful foster-home (you can read more about his early journey here).

As human beings, it's easy for us to get stuck in the story we are telling ourselves each day... we will continue to do a particular behaviour, or think particular thoughts, because we've always done it that way.  We interact with the world because of the labels we give ourselves - or accept from other people - "Anxious", "Introverted", "Extroverted", "Victim", "Intelligent", "Stupid"... When labels give us permission to limit ourselves, then we don't have to take responsibility - instead we can blame the label, because the label gives us our story... without realising that it's also the story that is "proving" the label.  Those "knots of our own making" that Rainer Maria Rilke wrote about.

There's a wonderful poem by Marianne Williamson, called "Our Deepest Fear" (I have it on the wall in my office), and in it she explains that it's our light, not our darkness that frightens us... our deepest fear, she says, is not that we are inadequate, but that we are powerful beyond measure...

In my work as a therapist and a trainer, I see many people who do change the stories they have been telling themselves, often for decades - it requires courage, and insight, and self-awareness, and self-compassion to do that, and I'm in awe every single time, because it proves the truth of Marianne's words...

And then I look at this beautiful little soul who has joined our family... every "first time" he does something new - like jumping up next to us on the sofa, or climbing up four steps instead of three, or allowing Luna to share his bed - he is releasing and re-writing a little bit of that old story and it makes my heart melt, because he's letting a little bit more of his light shine.

If he is not afraid to re-write his old story, why should any of us be?  In Marianne's words, again, "As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same..."  If we are bringing that kind of inspiration into the world, then what can happen?  That's another story - what if we were to write it?

Mungo's Teachings:
  • The past is for learning from, not for living in.
  • You don't have to believe everything you think.
  • Question constantly whether your story is serving life, and if it's not, tell yourself a new story and allow your light to shine.
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Teachings of Dog: What's in a Name...?

1/4/2021

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Mungo arrived into our lives a few weeks ago... confused and scared, he had been rescued from a puppy farm, where he had spent the first five years of his life as a stud dog - without care, kindness or even a name of his own.  His escape from this grim life was probably because he needed some expensive veterinary care, which he was unlikely to receive, unless he was surrendered into rescue - and fortunately for Mungo, this was the path that opened before him, thanks to the lovely folks at Friends of Animals Wales...

Following the removal of 33 teeth, funded by the wonderful Schnauzerfest charity, who supported all his veterinary costs whilst he was in rescue with FOAW, he then spent the first eight weeks of his new life with a kind and patient foster family, who began to teach him what it feels like to be loved...

Fast forward to the end of February, and this little boy had yet another huge upheaval when he moved yet again... this time to his forever home, with two little Lhasa sisters to show him the ropes.  However, it is very clear to us that although he is completely free from that old life, the abuse and neglect has deep roots, and he is still beset by the demons of his past... 

To begin with, he wouldn't eat.  I wasn't too worried at first, because of the stress of his move, but after a couple of days he began to taste - and then he stood back and just stared at me.  I suddenly got the message - he didn't like the bowl!  I turned his meal out onto a plate, and he devoured it ravenously; so now, Mungo eats from a plate... and not just any plate - he has three rather beautiful Art Deco plates that we bought specially for him.

For all of us, it's a journey of interpreting feelings and needs... the tilt of an ear, the twitch of a tail or the droop of a head can tell us so much when we are prepared to pay attention.  Unlike with people, there is no story to listen to, and be hooked by - we can only imagine what he has been through.  Just like many people though, when we do not have the self-worth to believe that we deserve to have our needs met, it was clear to us that Mungo felt deeply unworthy of many things in his new life.

It's an incredible joy when he responds... the first time he came towards us and stood to have his head scratched... the first time he lay down next to us on the sofa... the first walk, with tail and ears up, and eyes bright... all of these things mark a small rite of passage for him - the sign that he has given himself permission to accept this part of his new life and, in doing so, hopefully also to release part of the old.

But here's an interesting thing.  We chose his name because we liked it, and because it fit with our previous boy schnauzers (Theo, Hugo...).  In an idle moment, I looked it up, to find out the meaning.  It turns out that St Mungo is the patron saint of those who have been bullied, which is actually pretty perfect, and his feast day is 13 January.  As Mungo didn't have a proper birthday either, that seems pretty perfect, too, just like Mungo himself...

Mungo's Teachings:
  • Listen carefully and compassionately to others... that way you can pick up the needs behind the behaviours, even when the behaviours look unuseful.
  • Don't become a victim of your story... change is always possible.
  • Treat one another with kindness, patience, respect and love, because in the end we are all connected.
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  • Home
  • CPD Courses
  • Diploma in Clinical Supervision
  • Clinical Supervision
  • Wellbeing Coaching
  • Relaxation Recordings
  • About Us
  • Resources
    • What is Stress?
    • Stress in the Dental Practice
    • How NLPt can help the Dental Profession
    • Conversational Hypnosis in the Dental Practice
    • Interview for The Incisal Edge Podcast
    • What is Self-Hypnosis?
    • Techniques for Self-Hypnosis
    • NLP - A Practical Philosophy of Being
    • Goal Setting
    • Student Resources
  • Contact Joanna
  • Blog & Podcast